hard thoughts

anger and pain fear and doubt

hard thoughts are easy to ignore

cope with them bury them deep

shuffle them to the edge of night

say sweet things to coat them

divert them to a target unrelated

do you know my anger and pain

my fear and doubt i never show

if i told you would you see them

as they are and me for who i am

i can't be a phantom not to you

missing you is painful it rips me

it spits me out angry and fearful

i begin doubting what i know

these hard thoughts invade me

I also know they disappear as

quickly as they came they do not

linger inside me for long they pass

i'm afraid to open this hard side

i never have but i will with you

©paul viel 2004